For the last time, NO.

So, last week ABC announced that Lost will be returning to the schedule on Thursday, January 31, taking over the 9PM slot currently housing Grey’s Anatomy. (I usually do bar trivia on that night but I’ll follow the gospel of Tim Gunn and make it work.) We’ll see the eight episodes that make up the first half of the season, and hopefully the wait won’t be too long for the second half once the writers’ strike is over. Great, okay.

That’s all I freakin’ want to know.

So why then, why why why, must all the entertainment sites I like to read be forcing the new season four trailer on me like a life jacket on a struggling toddler as the boat capsizes? Go ahead, Google “Lost season four trailer” and see what comes up. Crazy town, that’s what! Third entry down, from tvsquad.com: “I went through the season four trailer frame by frame…” You did what?! Stop, just stop. I like to obsess over a show as much as the next person, but I usually focus on what’s already been aired. Sure, it’s pretty much impossible not to speculate about where the story might go next, but once things pass conjecture, it’s not fun anymore. When did we stop liking to be surprised? The producers themselves gave away months ago that Michael would show up again, something I would have definitely rather not known. I’m trying to trust that they have better surprises that won’t be on a glaring headline for TVGuide.com’s Ausiello Report three weeks before they happen. Given how well they hid the season three finale’s twist, I do have hope. But based on what’s happened in the past, once new episodes start airing it’ll be practically impossible not to hear often-all-too-true rumors about who’s going to get killed, who’s going to betray who, who’s coming back, etc.

However the odds are stacked against me, I’m going to do my best to limit how many spoilers I’m exposed to. I want surprise, dammit. So no, I will not be watching that season four trailer, no matter how they try to make me. No, I say, a thousand times no!

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Other projects:


Downton Gabby: podcasting about Downton Abbey from a funny, foul-mouthed, feminist perspective

Quick Lit: reading one short story a day in 2015

Grand Dames: collecting sundry achievements of admirable women

The MacGuffin: archive of my days as a film critic

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